Despicable Donnie has long been claiming he personally ended "eight" wars. Or, in late October 2025, he said possibly soon NINE wars.

This is what he meant as of early October 2025:

1. October 2025: Israel vs. Hamas. I hope so, but it's not a done deal as of October 22, 2025, when the news reported that Israel is rearming.
2. August 2025: Armenia and Azerbaijan have been fighting off and on for more than 40 years. As in several other cases, Armenia and Azerbaijan weren't actually fighting when Despicable Donnie brought their leaders to the White House and made them sign a peace agreement.
3. July 2025: After a 5-day cross-border skirmish, Despicable Donnie warned that if Cambodia and Thailand went to war, the US would stop trading with both sides. The Adjudicated Rapist in Chief insisted on a big-deal “peace agreement” to be signed in Malaysia on October 26, 2025.
4. June 2025: Like Armenia and Azerbaijan, Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of Congo had been fighting for decades. Despicable Donnie brought their leaders to the White House and made them sign a peace agreement — and the two sides are still building up troops and reportedly attacking each other.
5. June 2025: The “very stable genius” bombed Iran as a favor to Netanyahu, and then “brokered a ceasefire” between Iran and Trump's buddy. What a mensch. I'm sure there were no threats from Mr. Peace about what the US might bomb next.
6. May 2025: The Indian military launched deadly attacks on Pakistan after a terrorist attack in Kashmir. Trump announced “a full and immediate ceasefire” — and India replied, there may be a ceasefire at the moment, but the Convicted Felon in Chief does NOT get the credit!
7. July 2020: Egypt and Ethiopia were in a diplomatic standoff, because Egypt was afraid of what Ethiopia's Renaissance Dam would do to Egypt's water supply. They never fought, although Ethiopia accused Despicable Donnie of saying Egypt wanted to blow up the dam. Despicable Donnie now claims that they would have fought a war were it not for Donnie's brilliant mediation.
8. September 2020: Serbia and Kosovo have had territorial disputes since Kosovo declared independence in 2008; in 2025 Serbia still says it owns Kosovo, and NATO is still pushing for peace talks that never arrive — no matter what the Felon in Chief says.

Maybe ONE war, MAYBE, if Israel's National Security Minister Itamar Ben-Gvir was just joshing that Israel "must return to intense fighting" because "Hamas must be destroyed." Plus three instances of White House grandstanding, one bombing (SO peaceful!), one outright denial of Despicable Donnie's claims, and two inventions ... in 61 months, not eight.

Yeah, that's quite a list all right.... And in late October 2025, America's first god-emperor began to boast about ending his NINTH war, Russia's invasion of Ukraine — by letting Russia keep whatever parts of Ukraine that Russia is currently occupying. I'm sure that's going to go over big in Ukraine.

 
The Narcissist in Chief has no idea he's a sociopath, along with being amoral, unethical, dishonest, and given to cheating. He will never seek help, because that would mean that America's first god-emperor is not perfect. And Despicable Donnie is perfect in every way, a legend in his own mind.

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